refocusing
a quick letter to my abandoned projects
to my past projects,
i am returning to one of you right now and am determined to see you through to the end. mentioned briefly at the beginning of 2023 and since lingering beneath my other ambitions, pastimes, and obligations, i feel ready to realize you.
i feel hopeful and driven in this expedition and optimistic that seeing this project through will birth new ideas and rebirth projects that i’ve left by the wayside.
a few weeks ago i had a conversation with a friend about perfection and its impossibility and being held back by feeling ready. i decided at the end of that conversation that i was ready to be ready; i recently read somewhere: “Readiness is not a feeling / Readiness is a decision.”
hours after deciding that i was ready to take fresh steps towards putting my book together, i saw an open call for poetry manuscripts. a sign from the universe? maybe. an algorithmic suggestion based on my conversations and content consumption? more likely.
either way, here we are. the first steps of compiling the collection of poems that will make up my first manuscript are underway, and i have a plan and a timeline for its submission.
and i have an idea for a new project. and i’m considering reviving an old one and putting a new twist on it.
but both will have to wait— because the habit that i’m breaking here is abandoning one project for a new one that i think will be even better or more impactful or insightful or better received.
that cycle is over. because if i don’t end it, i’ll have no work to show for it.
so yes, i’m back for one of you. and maybe, hopefully, ideally i’ll be back for more— after i’ve seen this one through. i hope you’ll be patient with me. i’m sorry for leaving you behind but am so happy to be back with you.
yours for now,
Ev
